How To Cope With The Stress Of Hiding Your Sexual Orientation

Feeling like you can’t truly be yourself takes a toll on your mental well-being. That’s especially true for people pressured to hide their sexual orientation. You might fear what would happen if you came out to family, friends, or even your job. 

Hiding any part of your identity can lead to guilt and shame. You might even wonder if there’s something wrong with you. 

But, first and foremost, it’s important to understand that there is nothing wrong with who you are. The sooner you acknowledge and accept that the sooner your confidence will grow. Unfortunately, that probably won’t remove all the stress of hiding that part of yourself. So, what can you do to cope? 


Accept Yourself

It’s not always enough to realize there’s nothing wrong with who you are. You have to go beyond that and accept who you are. 

Essentially, you must come out to yourself before you come out to others. 

It’s important to feel strong about your identity, even if you’re just trying to figure things out or if these feelings are relatively new. The more you become self-aware and explore those feelings, the more confident you’ll be. You’ll be proud of it instead of ashamed, and you’ll have an easier time telling others. 

Confide in the Right People

You might sometimes be tempted to shout from the rooftops regarding your sexual orientation. Other times, you might be extremely fearful and white to hide away because you’re worried about what people will think. 

Find a happy medium. Consider a few people in your life who you can trust. Who will listen to you and accept you without judgment? Who will encourage you and support you through this next chapter of life? 

Coming out doesn’t have to be a major event where you tell everyone in your life all at once. Instead, talk to the people you’re comfortable with, and build a support system before you tell everyone. 

Practice Self-Care

Even as your confidence builds and you have people on your side to support you, it’s understandable to experience stress. This could be a major life change, and even if you feel good about it, it can be overwhelming. 

So, it’s more important than ever to take care of yourself as you become more open about your sexual orientation. 

Self-care is essential for everyone, but it’s crucial during times of stress. It also looks different for everyone. Things like prioritizing sleep, exercising, and eating a healthy diet can all improve your overall well-being. If you’re struggling with stress, focus on things that can boost your mental health, like journaling, mindfulness, and meditation. 

Reach Out for Help 

If you’re still dealing with stress regarding hiding your sexual orientation, consider reaching out for help. That might include finding a support group online or in person. Talking to others who have gone through similar situations can help you see the light at the end of the tunnel. You can receive actionable advice and realize that you’re not alone. 

To more effectively manage your stress throughout the process, a therapist can help. Not only will therapy help you learn the skills needed to deal with your stress, but it can boost your confidence and security in who you really are and why it’s okay to share that with the world. 

If you’ve been hiding your sexual orientation for any time, you don’t have to live with that weight on your shoulders forever. Feel free to contact me to set up an appointment for LGBTQ Counseling, and use the tips here to finally let go of that weight. 

Learn more about LGBTQ+ Therapy.

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Dealing with LGBTQ+ Specific Trauma and PTSD