🎙️ Episode 4: How to Find a Therapist Without Losing Your Mind (or Your Wallet)

Published: 4.10.25
Duration: 6 Minutes
Category: Mental Health, Therapy Access, Self-Advocacy

🎧 Listen Now

📝 Episode Summary

Finding a therapist shouldn’t feel like a full-time job—but it often does. In this episode, we walk through the practical side of therapy: how to find a provider, what questions to ask, and what options exist for different budgets. Whether you're using insurance, looking for sliding scale, or feeling totally lost in the process, this episode has you covered.

✨ You’ll Learn:

• Where to search for therapists and how to filter your options

• What “in-network,” “out-of-network,” and “sliding scale” actually mean

• The top questions to ask in a consult call

🧠 Try This After You Listen:

Pick one directory (like Psychology Today or Inclusive Therapists) and search using 2 filters that matter to you (like LGBTQ+ affirming or trauma-informed). Reach out to just one therapist with a short message.

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• Transcript

  Today we’re tackling one of the most unnecessarily complicated things in mental health: how the heck do you actually find a therapist?

  Because let’s be real—finding a therapist shouldn’t feel harder than the therapy itself. And yet, it often does. Between insurance directories, Psychology Today rabbit holes, and trying to decode phrases like “integrative relational psychodynamic trauma-informed somatic practice”... it’s enough to make you want to scream into the void and give up.

  So let’s make it simple. I’m going to walk you through where to start, what to look for, how to reach out, and how to tell if someone is actually a good fit—without needing a master’s degree in mental health jargon.

  First, ask yourself: what’s most important to you in this process? Is it cost? Identity match? Specialties? Location? Modality? Having a clear sense of your top priorities makes it easier to narrow down the noise. You don’t need a perfect therapist—you need someone who’s good enough and safe enough for you.

  Let’s talk insurance. If you’re using it, start with your insurance provider’s list—but be warned: those lists are not always accurate or up to date. So it’s worth cross-referencing those names on a therapist directory like Psychology Today, Therapy Den, or Inclusive Therapists. Many therapists don’t take insurance directly but can offer a superbill for reimbursement—so don’t panic if you see “private pay” listed. It’s not always a dealbreaker.

  If you’re not using insurance or if it’s out of network, search by fee range. Many therapists offer sliding scales or reduced-fee slots. And if you’re a student, check your university counseling center. Some training clinics offer therapy with interns at reduced rates under supervision. Free or low-cost options do exist—it just takes a little digging.

  Now, once you’ve found a few people who seem like they might fit—reach out. Send an email or use the contact form. Keep it simple. Something like, “Hi, I’m looking for support with anxiety and overwhelm. I saw you specialize in this and wanted to see if you’re accepting new clients.” You don’t have to pour your heart out in the first message. Just start the connection.

  And then comes the part no one talks about: the vibe check. Most therapists offer a free consult call. This isn’t a therapy session—it’s a chance to ask questions, get a feel for their style, and see how your nervous system responds to them. Some green flags? They ask thoughtful questions, explain their approach clearly, and make you feel seen, not sold to.

  If someone feels off or dismissive? You can keep looking. You’re not being rude. You’re building a relationship that requires trust, and that takes time. Finding the right therapist can take a few tries—and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re too difficult or that therapy “doesn’t work.” It just means you haven’t found your person yet.