How to Cope With The Feeling of Failure
No one likes feeling like a failure. Even if you understand that failing at something can foster growth, it doesn’t exactly feel good at the moment. Unfortunately, if you let that feeling sink in, it can cause you to spiral into self-doubt, low confidence, and a lack of motivation.
Feeling like you’ve failed can wreak havoc on your mental health. It’s far too easy for negative self-talk to take over, and that can lead to anxiety and depression and might keep you from trying things again.
Thankfully, it’s possible to shift your mindset into something positive. There are healthy, effective ways to cope with the feeling of failure that can make a big difference in how you feel about yourself, your efforts, and the future.
Let’s cover some coping strategies to help you silence negative self-talk and bounce back stronger.
Fight Back Against Your Thoughts
You can’t stop negative thoughts from creeping in, but you can decide how you want to respond to them. You can choose to believe them or challenge them.
A negative thought might be, “I am a failure.” Letting that thought sit with you and take control will dictate how you see yourself and your actions.
When you fight back against that thought by telling yourself you’re not a failure, listing your positive qualities, and thinking about your successes, you’re less likely to sit in that negative mindset.
Focus On the Positive
Thinking about your successes can be a great reminder that you are, in fact, not a failure.
If you often struggle with the feeling of failure, it can be helpful to keep a journal with you to write down your positive thoughts and your “wins” as often as they come up. Keeping this journal with you and keeping it updated is a fantastic way to silence those doubts and keep a running log of successes that you can look back on when you’re feeling low.
Redefine Failure
Sometimes, you can feel stuck with the feeling of failure because you’ve developed unrealistic expectations or your definition of failure is too strict.
Some of the most successful people in the world have failed in their endeavors multiple times. But they didn’t see it that way. They didn’t assume that missing their shot the first time meant they were doomed to fail forever. If they had, we wouldn’t have Apple, Disney, or a variety of other name-changing businesses and organizations.
By changing the way you think about failure, you’ll give it less power and give yourself more flexibility.
Be Kind to Yourself
How would you treat a friend or loved one who constantly put themselves down or considered themselves a failure? You would undoubtedly try to comfort them, reassure them, and build their self-esteem. You would show them kindness and compassion and focus on the positives rather than the negatives.
Why not do the same for yourself?
Self-compassion is always important, but it becomes necessary when struggling with feelings of failure. Be kind to yourself by practicing self-care. Do things for the well-being of your mental and physical health. Repeat positive mantras that help you feel more successful and strong.
Again, no one likes the feeling of failure. But it happens to everyone. It’s how you handle it and move forward that makes a difference. If you tend to get stuck with those feelings, keep these coping ideas in mind, and don’t hesitate to use them in your everyday life to boost your self-esteem and recognize your strengths.
Working with a therapist can help you overcome these feelings. If you are interested in learning more about therapy for self-esteem issues or anxiety therapy, don’t hesitate to reach out for support.
