What Is Polyvagal Theory? A Guide to Understanding Your Nervous System
Ever feel like your anxiety is running the show, no matter how much you try to "think your way out of it"? Or maybe you go completely numb under stress, unable to react at all?
That’s because your nervous system, not just your thoughts, controls your experience of safety, connection, and stress.
This is where Polyvagal Theory comes in. Developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, Polyvagal Theory explains how the nervous system responds to stress, trauma, and social connection. More importantly, it shows us how we can train our nervous system to feel safer, calmer, and more regulated.
In this guide, we’ll break down Polyvagal Theory in a way that makes sense, explore how it impacts anxiety, and give you practical strategies to help regulate your nervous system.
The Basics of Polyvagal Theory
Your Autonomic Nervous System: The Traffic Control Center of Stress and Safety
Your autonomic nervous system (ANS) is in charge of automatic bodily functions like heart rate, digestion, and breathing. But it also plays a huge role in how you react to stress, fear, and connection.
Polyvagal Theory breaks the ANS into three pathways, which determine how we respond to life’s challenges:
Ventral Vagal State (Social Engagement – “Safe & Connected”)
When you feel calm, safe, and connected to others, you’re in ventral vagal mode.
Your heart rate is steady, your digestion works well, and your brain is open to learning, socializing, and problem-solving.
This is where joy, curiosity, and emotional regulation live.
Sympathetic State (Fight or Flight – “Mobilized for Action”)
If your nervous system senses a threat, it activates the sympathetic state (fight or flight).
Your heart beats faster, muscles tense, and you feel restless, anxious, or on edge.
This is helpful in short bursts (like when you need to react quickly), but staying in this state too long can lead to chronic stress and burnout.
Dorsal Vagal State (Shutdown – “Freeze & Numb”)
When a threat feels too overwhelming, your nervous system shuts down to protect you—this is the dorsal vagal state.
You might feel numb, disconnected, exhausted, or even dissociated.
Think of it as an emotional "power down" mode when fight-or-flight isn’t an option.
How Polyvagal Theory Explains Anxiety & Trauma
Anxiety = A Nervous System Stuck in Survival Mode
If you struggle with chronic anxiety, your nervous system is likely spending too much time in fight-or-flight mode. Your body constantly scans for danger, even in safe situations, making it difficult to relax or feel present.
Trauma = A Nervous System That Struggles to Feel Safe
When someone experiences trauma—whether a single event or chronic stress, their nervous system learns to expect danger. This can cause hypervigilance (always on edge) or shutdown (emotional numbness), depending on how their nervous system adapted.
How to Regulate Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory
The good news? Your nervous system can be trained to feel safer, calmer, and more connected.
Here are science-backed ways to move out of survival mode and into ventral vagal (safe & connected) mode:
1. Engage in Safe Social Connection
Why it works: Your nervous system calms down when you interact with safe, supportive people.
How to do it: Spend time with people who make you feel at ease. If that’s not an option, even listening to a familiar, soothing voice (like a podcast) can help regulate your system.
2. Try Vagus Nerve Stimulation
Why it works: The vagus nerve is the highway to your nervous system, it tells your body whether it’s safe or not. Stimulating it helps shift you into a calmer state.
How to do it: Try humming, gargling, singing, or slow diaphragmatic breathing (long exhales).
3. Use Movement to Release Stuck Energy
Why it works: If your body is stuck in fight-or-flight mode, gentle movement can help discharge stress.
How to do it: Go for a short walk, shake out your arms, or do gentle stretching to signal to your body that it’s safe to relax.
4. Practice Grounding Techniques
Why it works: When your brain is overwhelmed, focusing on physical sensations can bring you back to the present.
How to do it: Try the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique (name 5 things you see, 4 things you feel, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell, 1 thing you taste).
5. Slow Your Breathing
Why it works: Deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, shifting you out of stress mode.
How to do it: Try box breathing (inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4).
Why This Matters for Anxiety and Therapy
Understanding Polyvagal Theory gives you a roadmap for why you react the way you do, and how to shift into a state of calm.
If you feel stuck in chronic stress, anxiety, or emotional shutdown, your nervous system might be waiting for cues of safety. By intentionally activating your ventral vagal state, you create the conditions for deeper healing.
Your Nervous System Can Learn Safety
Healing anxiety isn’t just about changing thoughts—it’s about teaching your nervous system that you’re safe.
Polyvagal Theory offers a new way to understand your emotions, reactions, and relationships. Instead of fighting against your body, you can work with your nervous system to cultivate resilience, calm, and connection.
Next Steps:
✅ Try one of the nervous system regulation techniques today
✅ Learn more about Polyvagal Theory through books and courses
✅ Work with a therapist who understands nervous system regulation
Your nervous system is always listening—let’s start sending signals of safety.
To find out more about my services, click here: Anxiety Therapy
